Emotionally Focused Therapy

Co-developed by Sue Johnson and Les Greenberg in the 1980s; Johnson later carried it forward as the leading approach for couples. One of the most research-supported couple therapies in existence. Based on attachment theory. The premise: most relationship conflict is not really about the dishes, the money, or the in-laws — it's about attachment fears. "Are you there for me? Do I matter to you? Can I count on you?"

The core pattern EFT addresses is the negative cycle (often pursuer-withdrawer): one partner pursues closeness; the other withdraws; the pursuer presses harder; the withdrawer shuts down further. Both people are driven by attachment fears, not personality flaws. EFT slows down the cycle, identifies the emotions underneath the surface behavior, and helps partners turn toward each other as a safe base.

Three stages: de-escalation of the negative cycle, restructuring attachment moments, consolidation and integration.

Origin

Sue Johnson & Les Greenberg, 1980s