Attachment Theory

Originally developed by John Bowlby (1950s-60s) to describe how infants bond with caregivers. Mary Ainsworth identified three infant styles. Hazan and Shaver applied it to adult romantic relationships in 1987. Levine and Heller made it mainstream. The premise: early experiences with caregivers create internal "working models" — templates for how safe and available you expect others to be — that show up directly in adult relationships.

**The four adult attachment styles:**

- **Secure** — Comfortable with intimacy and independence. Doesn't catastrophize conflict or distance. A slight majority of people; research estimates typically run 55-60%. - **Anxious (Preoccupied)** — Craves closeness, fears abandonment, hypervigilant to signs of rejection. Tends to pursue, overthink, and need frequent reassurance. - **Avoidant (Dismissive)** — Values independence highly, uncomfortable with emotional closeness, minimizes needs. Tends to withdraw when intimacy increases. - **Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized)** — Wants closeness but also fears it. Often linked to trauma or inconsistent early caregiving. The most difficult style to navigate.

Attachment styles are not fixed. They can shift toward security over time, especially through a consistently secure relationship or good therapy.

Origin

John Bowlby 1950s-60s; adult application Hazan & Shaver 1987